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Oscar Fashion: A Battle Between Good/Evil

Luke Skywalker battles Darth Vader.My major revelation about last night’s Oscar fashions didn’t hit me until I woke up this morning. What we saw, played out in very expensive designer gowns, was a battle between good and evil. Fashion was wrestling with itself, forcing the actresses/starlets who paraded down that red carpet to choose sides.

Let me explain.

Without a doubt, the most popular color spectrum for gowns was white/flesh/champagne/silver. Put some beads on it, cut one arm off, don a cape, have a cascading train, it was still that same color palette. A wide shot of the red carpet revealed men in black tuxes and then blurs of women who appeared to be naked, so close was the color of their gown to their skin tone.

The leader of the white pack was Gwyneth Paltrow, wearing a gown Princess Leia herself might choose for her big day. The white, strapless Tom Ford gown was complemented with a cape that draped regally from her shoulders and fell in a strict, straight line down her pilates-enhanced back.

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The Wednesday Outlook – July 6, 2011


This is what people in Wisconsin do for fun – make X-Wing Fighters.

I had a great 4th of July. My family went out on the ol’ party barge and went swimming in a sandy, shallow part of Lake Poygan so my five-year-old nephew could stand up and join in the fun of throwing water-soaked foam balls at each other while he yelled, ‘I will ruin you!” The kid has a good aim.

Today I woke up to endless coverage of the Casey Anthony verdict of not guilty. The Today Show devoted their entire broadcast to it, going from interviewing one of the lead prosecutors, Jeff Ashton (who seemed like a very intelligent, thoughtful, well-spoken guy) to Casey’s ex-fiance (super bitter, as is understandable, but he certainly dodged a bullet not actually marrying her) to Star Jones as they analyzed WHAT WENT WRONG.

Oh, and then there was their “mothers are outraged” angle, talking to two mothers with no personal stake in the case who went to Orlando to hear the verdict read. As in, one of them got on a plane and flew there just to hear the verdict. Wow, was she disappointed. These women were not very coherent.

When you see the circus that springs up around cases like this, it’s not hard to believe that there are people like Casey Anthony in the world. One report had her saying she plans to get pregnant as soon as she’s free.

But as everyone is pissing their pants and moaning, let’s all remember the story of O.J. Simpson. Although he will never serve a single day in prison for the murder of Nicole Simpson, he is in prison (serving a nine-year sentence for his role in an armed confrontation in Las Vegas).

This is because people like O.J. and Casey Anthony don’t go back out into the world and suddenly lead good lives. In Casey Anthony’s case, she has no education, a ruptured relationship with her parents, who were supporting her and her child before the murder, and few prospects for making money unless it’s related to the case.

So she’ll sell her story and get millions of dollars. But this will only make a terrible situation completely unmanageable. She will surround herself with bad people, spend all her money (or someone will steal it from her in the guise of “managing” it), get involved in relationships that break apart, get into drugs, alcohol, etc. She’ll probably make some bad porn.

And then she’ll get caught for doing something nefarious and end up back in court. And eventually people won’t care so much about her case or her story because the circus will move on to the next O.J./Casey/Michael Jackson/Anna Nicole spectacle.

So it’s about biding our time, people. And not pulling out our hair that “justice wasn’t served” for that little girl. She was doomed from the moment she was born to a mother who is surely a sociopath and an absentee father who may or may not (as the Anthony family claims) have died in a car crash.

The true injustice will be if she does have more children. What we should be praying for is not “Justice for Caylee” but birth control for Casey.

OK, now I’ll climb down off my soapbox…

Reading: Bossypants by Tina Fey and Reading My Father by Alexandra Styron

Watching: Breaking Bad Season 3, yo! This is one of the best shows on TV. I’m trying to catch up before season 4 premieres on July 17th.

Anticipating: A bike ride from Minneapolis to Stillwater.