The Wednesday Outlook, May 6th

It’s official. I can’t stand the word “eponymous.” If I hear it used one more time in reference to an album, particularly on hipster radio, I’m going to implode. Yeah, we get it, but can’t you just say “self-titled?” My favorite example is on Wikipedia: Bad Company‘s first album Bad Company released in 1974 is another example that also contained a track that was a Rock Radio favorite of the same name, “Bad Company“. “Rock Radio” is capitalized on Wiki; I didn’t do it. Did “Rock Radio” become a proper noun? I guess R.E.M. still has the final word on this very pretentious word with their album Eponymous from 1988.

I’m tiring of Facebook. I can’t keep up with people or with all layout changes. I’ve stalled out on my friend collecting because 1) I don’t like very many people enough to friend them and 2) I don’t meet enough new people because, uh, I’m a bit misanthropic. Maybe those reasons are really one in the same? I guess it’s cool if people have 600 friends but I never will. Probably I’m not Facebook material. I wasn’t popular in high school.

I’m considering not keeping up with my profile anymore; just checking out. I’d miss hearing about when someone had a doctor’s appointment or when someone else is going to a CD release show but essentially I think my life would be the same. Besides, it seems as if the FB creators are just fucking with us now, changing applications and design daily in order to confuse us, keep us on our toes, make us feel as if we’ve got to keep up with them. You can never relax and just enjoy Facebook. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying social media is going away or that it’s evil. It’s just so anxiety-producing. Another thing to check several times a day. Should I change my profile picture? Do I need to join your cause so you don’t think I’m a bitch? If I don’t know you, should I be your friend anyway? For all I know you friended me so that you can hit number 500 and if I say no, I’ll be keeping you from hitting your goal. AAAAAAHHHH! If there is a “defector” site where people are going to get off the Facebook grid, someone let me know.

Last night marked The Return of Kettleworx. Somewhere along the 6 Week Transformation we fell off the wagon, felled by sickness and exhaustion. I have to say that during this time when I haven’t been performing Kettleworx, I noticed that my muscles were reverting back to their sad, jelly-like state, which speaks volumes about what even a bit of kettlebell-ing can do for a person.

Well, we came back in a big way with CARDIO WEEK 4. Maybe it would have made sense to go back to the beginning and start over but no, we charged ahead like reckless frat boys. Essentially, if you want to get into shape, you need to do two things quite a bit: squats and pushing things up over your head. Pushing a weight up over your head, “engages the core,” according to Ryan. Everytime I stop exercising (so many times in my life I’ve lost count) the muscles that most quickly return to flab are in my inner thighs. It’s as if these muscles have no memory of ever having been asked to do anything! Any little exertion and they become sore. So now the question becomes, will we keep it up? Will we actually complete the 6 Week Transformation, now lagging into its 12th week? I had a crazy idea that, as soon as we complete the 6 Week Program we do it again only TURBO CHARGE it and do one workout every other day, religiously, so that it works out to doing the 6-week program in 3 weeks. Something like that. I would be so ripped! I would be into those skinny jeans that Ryan loves to talk about. He also loves to talk about “lifting up the buttocks” though so you have to take the good with the bad.

A phrase that might actually be funny again, if said at just the right moment, is, “Homey don’t play that!” Remember that line? I was just thinking it would be funny to see someone yell this at a customer service counter if they weren’t getting their way.

I received a Moleskin Watercolor Notebook for my birthday from my sister, along with various other art supplies like colored pencils. I have to say that I think the gift of art supplies is the coolest gift ever. I used to be into making art and drawing although I was not “good” at it. I’m embracing the not-good-at-it thing and am going to dare to be average at sketching things. What’s foremost in my mind right now is the idea of sketching little things I find while walking. Yesterday I found a robin’s egg that had hatched open but the top had neatly fallen into the larger part of the egg so that all the pieces were there. How thoughtful of the little bird who pecked its way out, to be so neat about it!

I picked it up, ignoring all the warnings I’ve heard since childhood about how dirty bird’s eggs can be. Did anyone else hear this all the time? Apparently, birds are filthy creatures. I did have this bizarre train of thought though: woman picks up egg while walking to her car, woman gets egg/bird virus into her body and contracts flu or other disease (I know, this probably is not possible but it’s just stream of consciousness), infects other people, causes pandemic, is examined by World Health Organization and asked how she might have come into contact with the virus and she has to admit that she picked up a robin’s egg. “Why would you do such a thing?” they ask her. “Um… I wanted to sketch it? See, I’m taking up drawing even though I suck at it and I’m not even going to try to become good at it.”

But have you seen a robin’s egg lately? They really are the most beautiful blue color. I’m “seeing” in a new way already.

What’s up for the weekend: Besides Mother’s Day… I think we’re venturing to the enormous Friends School Plant Sale at the State Fairgrounds. We went last year and they had so many plants it was overwhelming. It helps to have a list or something specific in mind. If you don’t mind crowds, it’s a great place to stock up on plants you can’t find just anywhere, like when running into Cub Foods for some bread when you happen to notice that they have some geraniums for sale and wouldn’t you like some geraniums? This is more like exotic thistles or some new purple daisy/mum hybrid. Plants with names like “Creeping Up on the Baby” and “Biscuit in a Hammock.” It makes you feel rad, just buying this stuff.

One thought on “The Wednesday Outlook, May 6th

  1. Don’t be surprised if you find new plants at the Friends School Plant Sale next year with the following names:
    “Biscuit in a Hammock” and “Creeping Up on the Baby.” Words have power, you know.
    -Dhaivyd Hilgendorf, Plant Sale Organizer

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