I admit to being scared last night before the Great Core Workout of 09. First there was the fact that I am still having trouble sitting and walking after the cardio workout. Next there is the Mystery Foot Problem. Some mysterious hurt has been angering my left foot for over a week. But you don’t want to read about that.

You want to read about CORE!

Core is not as fright-inducing. Or maybe my core is just stronger than my limbs. It was actually kind of… fun. CORE! consists of exercises concentrating on building your… core. Front and back. So there are sit-ups, side bends, etc. Except there are three sets so you do the routine three times and the jokes get a little stale. But Ryan won my heart when he said, “You wanna look good in your jeans? Have a nice firm backside? Then this is what you gotta do.” We proceeded to hold our kettle bells to our chests while lying on our back with feet up. Then we raise the bell up while raising our butts off the ground and squeezing at the same time. You can feel the fat disintegrating. Not really. But then when it’s over Ryan sits up and says, “That’s the way you do it!”

I like it when trainers on DVDs talk to me while I’m working out. I like when they intuit why I’m doing their exercises. No, I’m not training for anything, I don’t want to compete in anything; I want to look better in jeans. Is that so wrong? Ryan knows this. He’s dorky but super fit. I think that’s what I like in a personal trainer.

When he’s doing one of about a hundred side bends he explains that its going to get rid of “those love handles.” They are going to melt away. Anytime you twist your core, you are helping to resist love handles, aka “muffin top.” No, he doesn’t say “Muffin Top,” but I do. Muffin top seems like a relatively new slang expression and is geared more towards women. Heavier women often have a muffin top that hangs over the tops of their jeans – that roll of flesh that comes over like a baked muffin over the stem part. I’m not judging; I’m just explaining in case you hadn’t heard the expression or, um, ever seen it. If you’ve never seen it or experienced it… well, you’re weird.

Today I am not sore from CORE!

Just as a note: it may seem like all I do now is KettleWorx. This is not true. Right now, for example, I am watching Entertainment Tonight.

I like the people in the KettleWorx DVDs who work out in the background. Some of the women are very skinny and ripped but some are not. They all seem very friendly and multicultural. This is especially comforting to someone who went to college in the 1990s.

Next up: Resistance Workout 1. We are hoping to learn the “pull the gun out of the holster and shoot” move we saw Ryan demo on TV.